Think a minute…A popular song said: “People who need people are the luckiest people in the world.”But to learn how to live happily and successfully with people, we must first unlearn our unhealthy, bad ways of relating to others.
Sometimes we run away rather than work through our disagreements and differences. Like a child who gets angry and says: “I’m going home! I’m not going to be your friend anymore!” We feel wronged and hurt, so we quit our job, end a friendship, even get a divorce. We take the easy way and just move on rather than grow up. But if you keep moving on from one relationship to another, you will never have the success and satisfaction of close, lasting relationships.
Many couples could learn to live happily together if they did not resort to a revenge or payback mentality. But lashing out and hurting the other person just makes things worse and is the most damaging way to deal with our differences. This especially includes the lasting pain and problems through which we put our kids. We would have much happier lives if instead we simply admitted our faults and changed what we need to in our marriage, parenting, and other relationships.
The first ingredient of successful relationships is communication. With no communication, you have no relationship. At the end of our life, some of our biggest regrets will be all the things we did not say to the ones we love. We so often misunderstand and misread people. That is why we need to kindly tell each other how we truly feel and not pretend everything is fine. The sooner we open up and honestly talk about our real feelings, the sooner we will be happier and healthier.
A second ingredient we need for strong, happy relationships is acceptance. Can you honestly say to people: “I accept you just as you are. You can make your own choices and mistakes, say what you really feel, and I will never reject you. I will always accept you even if I do not approve of the wrong things you do or say.”Do you have that kind of honest, unconditional love for others?
Finally, the third ingredient we need for successful, mature relationships is forgiveness. Since we’re human, we all hurt each other and need forgiveness many times. Yet we often fail to truly forgive others when they hurt us. That is why we desperately need the only One Who can. It’s only with Jesus’ kind of real love and power that we can forgive daily like that. Won’t you ask Him to forgive you for all of your wrongs and hurts you have caused other people? Ask Him to take charge of your heart every day—so you can begin to communicate, accept, and forgive others just as He has you. Just think a minute…