74a – Formula for Failure
Think a minute…None of us wants to fail. So, we must make sure we are not following the formula for failure. This includes our wrong thinking, attitudes, actions, and general way of living. Don’t forget: “The cost of failure is higher than the price of success.”
The first rule for failing: Have no goals in your life. Do only the minimum of what you absolutely must do. Don’t try to find a better way of doing things. Just do what is easy for you. Remember, “You’re not a failure until you’re satisfied with being one.” People who started with nothing and made themselves successful made a decision to change the way they were living. “If you do not want more out of life, you’re guaranteed not to get more.”
Rule number two on how to fail: Put off until tomorrow what you can do today. If you ever feel motivated to make a good change in your life, just wait until the mood leaves you, then you will end up doing nothing. Research done at a leading university showed that what makes us successful is more our attitude than our ability. The evidence showed that 93% of our success comes because of our motivation, attitudes, and choices, but only 7% is because of our skills and knowledge.
The third rule for failing is to be negative. “Failure can go to your head.” When you keep thinking negative thoughts about yourself and reminding yourself of your past failures, or how you might fail if you try something new, you guarantee your own failure. But the good news is, “Your past failures can also be signs that guide you to your future success. Some of the best lessons we learn are from our mistakes.” If you want to change your life, you must first change your way of thinking about yourself and the kind of life you want. If you get the right picture of yourself in your head, then your character, attitudes, and behavior can start to match that right picture in your mind.
Since you only live once, why not make it the right, best life you were designed to have and enjoy? Ask your Maker to help you stop your wrong thinking and habits that cause your life to fail. Then ask Him to start changing your heart, so you can start learning to think and live His way—since it’s the only way you can be truly successful both personally and professionally. Just think a minute…
74b – Marriage Medicine (Part 1)
Think a minute…A divorced husband and wife said: “We broke up because of illness in the family: we got sick of each other.” Sadly, the longest living institution of humanity is experiencing an epidemic disease that’s infecting and injuring the lives of millions of couples and their children.
Furthermore, many of the couples who stay together still have not learned how to have a healthy, happy relationship. Today and tomorrow, we will look at some of the unhealthy conditions in marriage. Then we’ll prescribe some medicines to heal and strengthen our marriage for a satisfying life together.
The first deadly disease in marriages is selfishness. “Many marriage problems are caused by the marriage of two people who are in love—with themselves.” This is the husband who sees his wife as the one who gives him what he wants as a cook, cleaner, money maker, and lover. He likes to show her off like a new car, but when her paint fades and her engine slows down, he wants to trade her in for a new model. This selfish, childish kind of character and thinking does not know what mature, manly love is. Love and marriage is “for men only” who are strong enough to put the needs of their wife first.
In the same way, a selfish and domineering wife can take her feminism and women’s liberation too far by not respecting and treating her husband as a man. As one husband said, “My wife is the nicest guy you’ll ever meet!” A bossy, unkind, critical wife will gradually tear down her husband’s self-confidence; plus rob him and their children of their respect for him as their father. Her daily disrespecting of him continues to cut him down and make him less of a man instead of more of a man. Sadly, “Some wives work so hard to make good husbands they don’t make better wives.” This kind of wife needs to take a long, honest look at herself to clearly see her own wrong heart and character faults.
A second marriage sickness is busyness. In many marriages both the husband and wife have full-time careers. Even stay-at-home mothers are extremely busy with their children’s schooling, housekeeping, paying bills, cooking, part-time employment and countless other duties. So, when the husband goes out with the boys after work instead of coming home, couples have even less time to be alone with each other and keep their relationship close, strong, and satisfying.
Today, whatever your marriage problem may be, won’t you ask the Creator of love and marriage to start healing your relationship with your spouse. Then, ask Him to start changing your heart, so you can become the lifetime companion your husband or wife needs. Just think a minute…
74c – Marriage Medicine (Part 2)
Think a minute…Someone said: “Love is a fantasy that is cured by marriage.” But, in fact, marriage is not the problem. It’s people’s wrong understanding and expectation of marriage that is the problem. Yesterday we talked about the epidemic disease that is infecting and injuring many marriages. Today we will finish with another unhealthy condition; then prescribe some medicine to heal and rebuild our relationship and life together.
A third sign of sickness in marriage is a communication breakdown. As a comedian said: “My wife and I sleep in separate rooms. We have dinner apart. We take separate holidays. We’re doing everything we can to keep our marriage together!”
Many husbands and wives drift apart gradually over time…until finally they’re like two strangers sitting at a dinner table with nothing to talk about. They become “married singles” living separate lives under the same roof. Their daily attention to each other slowly fades away into their busyness and interest in other friends and fun.
So, what marriage medicines can help us with these different marriage illnesses? First, accept your wife or husband the way they are. Remember, everybody has some weaknesses—including you. “The wife who criticizes her husband’s faults needs to remember they may have kept him from getting a better wife.” You cannot pick and choose which parts of your spouse’s personality you will love and accept, and which parts you will not. Real love accepts your mate’s weaknesses and also admits your own. This includes saying “I’m sorry” when you are wrong.
Second, never forget what first attracted you to each other. Make the time and effort to keep your romance alive with thoughtful, tender words, kindnesses, and special surprises. Say and do those things you know your mate appreciates—even if it is not your own favorite thing. That is what mature, adult love for your “other half” is and does.
A famous actress said sadly: “Marriage is the miracle that transforms the kiss from a pleasure to a duty.” But she is wrong! Marriage does not do that; husbands and wives do that when they do not choose to keep their love fresh and alive each day. Remember, our children deserve to have a father and mother who show them what a close, happy marriage looks like. Then they will know how to have a happy marriage themselves when they grow up and become adults.
Today, if your marriage could use some healing and help, sincerely ask the original Maker of marriage to take full charge and start changing your heart with His real love. Jesus will help you change day by day, so you and your spouse can begin enjoying the satisfying love and life together He planned for you. Just think a minute…
74d – Sleepwalking through Life
Think a minute…This is a true story about an American president you’ve probably never heard of. In March 1849, President James Polk was finishing his term as the U.S. president. The newly elected president, Zachary Taylor, was scheduled to start his term on 4 March. But 4 March, 1849 was a Sunday, and Zachary Taylor was a religious man; so he refused to take his oath of office on a Sunday. But according to the U.S. constitution, President Polk could not remain in office even one day longer than his four-year term.
Who would be the president for that one day? The U.S. constitution instructed that the Head of the Senate would temporarily be president until the new president could take his oath of office. The Head of the Senate at that time was David Atchison. So, for those 24 hours—from 12:00 noon on 4 March until 12:00 noon on 5 March, 1849—David Atchison was the legal president of the United States. The American President you likely have never heard of. But that’s not the whole story.
President Polk’s last week in office was a very busy one. Senator David Atchison did not miss a day of work. Neither did he miss all the farewell celebrations and parties for President Polk. When Senator Atchison finally went to sleep late on Saturday night, 3 March, he was so exhausted he told his landlady not to awaken him for any reason at all. She faithfully followed his instructions not to wake him, not even in time for him to publicly take office as the U.S. President! In fact, Senator Atchison was so tired that he slept all day Sunday through noon on Monday, 5 March. David Atchison, President of the United States, actually slept through his entire term of office! What a record and legacy.
Sadly, some of us almost sleep through our entire lifetime. Not physically, of course. But we “sleepwalk through life” by simply going through the motions and routine of surviving from one day to the next. We live every day the same. We never change. This is tragic since we are made to live a fully purposeful and passionate life that makes a difference in the world. Today, won’t you ask Jesus to take full charge of your life? He will give you your real purpose and passion He created you for. He will also give you the power you need to daily live it. His way is the only way you will not “sleepwalk” through one more day of your life. Just think a minute…
74e – Learning to Love
Think a minute…”Love at first sight is often cured by a second look.” A popular song said: “I’d give everything I own for just one minute of real love.” Deep down we know we have not really lived if we have not really loved. If love is what life is all about, why are we not better at it by now? Someone said: “It is amazing that after thousands of years, humans still have not learned how to love others better.”
One part of our problem is that we do not spend true quality time actually practicing, improving, and learning how to love. We seem to make time for almost everything else, then whatever time is left over is what we spend with the people we love. Remember: “Working overtime pays more because of what you’re missing.” Time with the people you love is one of your most valuable possessions.
Our greatest ambition in life should be to learn how to love truly well. When people are dying, you never hear them say: “Bring me my money one more time before I die.” The only thing we want during our last moments of life is the people we love—because we know they are the ones who made our life worth living.
Our challenge is that we cannot learn how to really love until we have seen real love in real life. Until I have been truly loved by someone else, I do not know how to truly love others. You’re probably thinking: No one has always loved me like that. Loved me completely, without conditions, just as I am. But the fact is someone actually has loved you like that for your entire life. We learn how to love by seeing God’s real love for us in Jesus. He always loves you unconditionally.
No person in history has lived and shown us such a pure, powerful, and perfect love as He did. This is because He is love itself. Jesus came to show us what true love looks like. He has given us the clearest picture and proof of His love for us—by sacrificially giving His perfectly innocent life for all of our wrong living and sins. Only He is able to change our sinful nature and self-centered heart, so we can begin to love others with His own Christ-like love.
How do you learn to love? You let Jesus love you first, and ask Him to take full control of your heart and character. Then as you receive His real love and power every day, you can start learning how to love people unconditionally like He does, since you will be getting the love you need from Him. Just think a minute…